“We just hate everyone” – a statement from the masochistic martyrdom paranoia complex society

THE politics of condemnation is one that all politicians and almost all commentators have become all too familiar with over the period of the Troubles and in more recent weeks.

But sometimes there is sheer bewilderment at the stupidity, arrogance and hate-filled spite that spews from some.

If it was not bad enough that some of the so-called dissident groups murdered, in cold blood, Constable Ronan Kerr, or that morons targeted a football manager, we had to listen to a litany of targets and collaborators from a masked idiot.

The police were targets, with Roman Catholic officers being prime targets, and anyone else they might come up with on a Saturday night. But, they also slammed Church men, constitutional politicians, the GAA and no doubt were adding anyone in the rest of the population of Ireland, north and south, to their potential legitimate targets, along with the entire nations of Scotland, England and Wales, with the EU to follow shortly afterwards.

They are the worst sort of masked idiots; ones with no real agenda other than hatred and violence. Whatever agenda they may pretend to have is so out of touch with the reality experienced by the majority of Northern Ireland’s 1.8m residents. Sure we rarely agree on anything, but the days of sectarian murder, town centres crippled and pulverised, lives and limbs torn apart are behind us. What sort of twisted nostalgia wants that all to happen again.

We have a theory: masochistic martyrdom paranoia complex. It’s a personality disorder that feels that the sufferer’s life is not complete unless a notional state entity, is wedded with conspirators in churches and politics, working with every civilian to punish illegally the sufferer’s ‘cause’.

The sufferers of masochistic martyrdom paranoia complex are easy to spot by their actions, such as wittering on to a few dozen halfwits, murdering people and trying to destroy the economy.

Unfortunately they are harder to identify as their idea of fashion is a balaclava and they prefer to skulk about in the dead of night committing their foul deeds against humanity.

We’d like to offer a final message to sufferers’ of masochistic martyrdom paranoia complex from a Republican background: we slag off anyone and everyone in a form of humour sometimes called satire. We’re not always good at it, but we are even-handed, so sufferers from a Loyalist background have been our legitimate targets too. But we target with words. Perhaps you’d be so kind to seek psychiatric help in the meantime.