Monday 13 September 2010

We’re doomed...we fight against doom...we’re still doomed

SINN Féin and the DUP have not always seen eye-to-eye. That is as basic a truism as they come in Northern Ireland politics.

At a time when the Con-Lib coalition of terror is warning that if it can be cut they have the knife ready to slice away, one would have thought that our esteemed ministers in the Northern Ireland Executive would sit down and agree what way to play this.

Not a bit of it. Behind closed doors they may sit down, share anguished glances across the room and sip thoughtfully at a snifter of orange juice or green chartreuse, but when it comes to statements for public consumption...then they kick into another gear altogether.

First Minster Peter Robinson has been telling us all that we are doomed: an economy stuck in recession almost in perpetuity, with cuts piling upon cuts to the value of £2bn on top of existing efficiency savings.

Meanwhile Sinn Féin’s Mitchel McLaughlin has said we must fight the British Government’s cuts, and the Executive shouldn’t just roll over at the behest of their Treasury paymasters.

One detects the subtle influence of forthcoming elections.

Every half sensible person knows that the cuts are coming. The unions may be right that the banks helped cause the mess, and that they should pay. However, the massive budget deficit was as much to do with the Brown administration’s profligacy, as it was it was to do with the banking crisis.

All manner of cuts to services are being contemplated, both nationally and locally.

Is Peter Robinson positioning himself as the man who will take the tough decisions? And is Sinn Féin positioning themselves as the party that will ‘resist’ the Brits and their sneaky slicing away of Irish life?

Whatever, this week has also seen the emergence of that wonderful euphemism: “efficiency savings”. An efficiency saving is usually when someone sees a better, more efficient way of doing something.

In the public sector parlance it usually means you are getting less money this year; so make do!

Which, in most languages, translates to a ‘cut’!

First in the firing line is the Department of Culture Arts and Leisure. After a warning last week from a senior official, this week the DCAL committee heard that sports as we know it, and the arts will be no longer able to deliver all the services that previously delivered.

Damn!

We were so looking forward to that interpretive modern dance routine that encapsulates the ‘north’s’ passion for Gaelic sport with a musical parody of the English football team’s World Cup flop, with a penalty taking master class from David Healy!

However much we want to make jokes at the expense of the language of Ulster-Scots or artists’ tendency to spend too much time navel gazing, or sports innate ability to shoot itself in the foot, the point is a serious one.

DCAL’s cuts are the thin end of the wedge. After this, the Executive will need to speak with a common tongue to explain just what the hell is going to happen come October 20th.

Before the May elections that is, unfortunately not likely to happen.

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